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Wednesday, 30 July 2014

Gilnockie would be busy – ye had us a’ in sic a tizzy

IN answer to the challenge set by Tom Hutton at Gilnockie Burns supper.

“Snaw – slippery, slithery white, why did ye fa’ on sic a night

Ye kent Gilnockie would be busy – ye had us a’ in sic a tizzy.

Phoning gritters – please be kind, tae a’ the folks who hae a mind

Tae get tae the best Burns Nicht of a’– held as ayeways in Gilnockie Ha’.

The gritters came no’ yince but twice, scattering their load upon the ice

They’re worth their salt – knights of the road, and days as well if truth be told.

The roads are safe I thought, and smiled – nae mair worries, relax a while.

John Murrays’s gang – they cleared the sna’, frae roon aboot oor wee bit ha’.

The ladies worked as ladies do, making soup and making stew,

Preparing haggis for a hunner – but then, oh mercy, whit a scunner.

For sna’ – ye werena finished quite, cos doon ye cam wi’ all yer might

That’s it I thought, a wash-oot or – a snaw-oot, that’s what we’re in for!

What if oor speakers canny come, I’ll hae tae think what could be done.

Alex D could tak the chair – and oh glory, what is mair –

He’ll recite aul “Tam O’Shanter”, and provide a wee bit banter

Agriculture – Robert Chalmers, a weel-kent, liked and local farmer.

Big Tom Gifford – came this morning, perhaps he had an early warning!

The Lassies toast – that could be Des, reply by Nessie Grant no less.

A singer, well we’ll collar Jane – of Langholm Opera and Panto fame.

Ach weel – we’ll hae tae wait and see, if we need oor plan, then let it be.

Then – in folks come, looking for places – an expectant look upon their faces

They keep on coming – two by two, looking for John tae pay their dues.

We hae an audience – man that’s great, but speakers, singers, chairman –wait!

For in comes Alan – glory be, a’ the way frae The Holm – oor Chairman’s here.

Oor main guest noo, comes through the door – Mr. Hutton, a’ covered wi’ sna’

Then Cornet Elliot next, and wow – oor faithful pianist Margaret Howe.

Why did we worry and be sae silly – cos next from Annan is David Gillies.

Followed by Nancy and Bob McLure, with amazing Grace – we’re safe for sure.

Hard tae believe on sic a night, wi’ the sna’ still fa’ing wi’ a’ its might.

Just yin guest missing – twa minutes tae eight, and Jennifer’s here tae sing – that’s great!

Next I hear Mr Iain Bell – tuning his pipes, ach – all is well.

The haggis is carried aloft to cheers, oor Supper’s safe for another year!

So gratefu’ thanks tae a’ folk there, tae the ladies wha cooked and men wha served.

Tae oor Chairman, speakers and singers too, a debt of gratitude we owe to you.

A successfu’ nicht at Gilnockie Ha’, oor guests and audience defied the sna’

We still survive, we stood the test – and Gilnockie Burns Supper is STILL THE BEST!”

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